Negotiations

On Friday afternoon, Andrea and I went to an appointment with my surgeon, Dr. Chamberlain. We heard THINGS about this surgeon- he was (as the rumors went) freakishly tall.  Everyone who dared to speak his name spoke of his height, and the fact that he is a damn fine doctor.  So when we showed up Friday, we were alittle tentative.  Would I make a wisecrack?  I mean if he was over seven and half feet tall like everyone had said, how would I respond?  I am known throughout Southern CA for many things: my obsessive knitting, my insistent whining about the weather, and my great hair (thanks Heather!)  But I am not known for my tact or couthness.  I didnt want to offend the man who will fish out my kidney for Mikie; much rested on my ability to NOT notice to his giant stature.

A man walks by us in the office, and I scarcely take note.  Why?  For two reasons: one, they had a fish tank and I love myself some Finding Nemo, and two, the man that had passed before me wasnt any taller than Mikie.  In the high sixes with some inches.

Well, it was the doctor and he says that he gets that all the time from the diminutively vertical.  And then he got down to business.

Dr. Chamberlain gave us a run down of  the surgery, what to expect and answered most of my questions.

I will have an IV in my hand for at least 2 days.  And a catheter.  Fabulous. They scar will be small, on my right or left side right below my last rib.  The stitches will be internal and dissolve.  He said the scar wouldnt effect the summer season.  Since I fear the sun and sharks, this is not a major concern.  When I wondered about the proposition of getting a more gruesome scar, he reassured me of the scars minimalism. I guess I didnt make myself clear.

Next I thought, well I need to get a feel of the kind of pain and discomfort that I am going to be in.  I told him that is my 6th surgery (two nasal reconstructions after breaks, one cyst removal, and 2 for a broken ankle -metal in and metal out.)  Was this going to hurt more than, say, an ankle brake?  Yep, he replied its going to hurt.  More than a kick in the face (first nose brake)?  Yep, its going to really hurt.  More than a tattoo on the inside of your arm?  Yep, its going to really really hurt.  He had had a surgery for his lung, and that was super painful.  So, he says, it will probably be like that.

To my luck they will be giving me painkillers, and to quote my friend Kelly, "They are going to give you drugs that u cant even get on the street."  Which is saying alot because she and I both live in Long Beach.

Kevin and I are moved in the Grand Central recovery ward, and Andrea (who is a total rockstar in dealing with all of us and everything) just brought me a pink robe for the hospital and some dog slippers.  Kevin is running errands and Im off to a nap.